♥ Welcome To Old Bat's Belfry! ♥

What You'll Find. Single Fantasy book reviews, funny author and reader interviews, SFF lists (blogs, websites, authors), articles and experiments in the art of blog promotion.

♦ Purpose. This blog is a companion to Dragons, Heroes and Wizards where I do nothing but Fantasy series reviews. This blog is where I put everything else.

♦ So where should you start? Try the menu bar located at the top of the page. (Tap menu in mobile) and pick your poison from the list!

Thank you for stopping by and I sincerely hope you enjoy your stay!

Friday, April 18, 2014

Fun Friday 14 ~ What is your favorite Fantasy or Sci-fi joke?

Three cheers for Friday!

I had another of those "play chauffeur" weeks. Three doctor appointments (not mine), shopping trip, visit to easter bunny (He says Hi! btw.) Combine that with several of those "I can't buy sleep" days and I'm a tired puppy. But I got a little done.

Anyway, lets get to the fun part of this post!

This week is all fun and totally depends on viewer participation.

Laughing Alien

I want your funniest Sci-fi/fantasy related jokes! 

Any joke contributed, on facebook, twitter, pinterest or the comment section below, will be added to this post. No NSFW jokes please.Well, you can send them to me if you want, and I'll likely fall over laughing, but I won't add those to this post.

You can stick with one joke, or do several if you want. It is all good because my goal is to come up with a whole list that will keep readers laughing for days.

So get to posting people! This can't succeed if you don't help.

♥ Answers ♥

♦ 1 ♦
I read recipes the same way I read fantasy. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's never going to happen." (Me)

♦ 2 ♦

Q. Do you know why G.R.R. Martin never uses Twitter? 
A. Because he killed all his 140 characters! (Madalena @ Space and Sorcery)

♦ 3 ♦ 

What has an IQ of 12
13 dwarves.
Don't you mean 12 dwarves?
No - there's bound to be one thick one. (Author David Burrows, Prophecy of Kings)

♦ 4 ♦ 

Two dwarves in a field and one says -"Look at that dead crow!"
The other dwarf looks in the sky and says "Where?" 
(Author David BurrowsProphecy of Kings)

♦ 5 ♦ 

What do you call a field full of dwarves - a thicket. (Author David BurrowsProphecy of Kings)

♦ 6 ♦

Fairy God Mother joke: An elderly lady, rocking on her front porch wistfully reflected on her long life. Abruptly her Fairy Godmother suddenly appeared before her and said she'd grant her 3 wishes and sorry for the delay. 

"Well," said the woman, "If you really are my Fairy godmother make me rich beyond my wildest dreams.

"She was amazed as her house turned to solid gold with emerald decorated windows.

"Wow! Can you turn me into a beautiful, young princess," she said.

Without a word the Fairy Godmother waved her wand and the elderly lady was transformed into a beautiful young princess.

"Your third wish?" asked the Fairy Godmother. Just then the old woman's cat wandered across the porch in front of them. 

"Oh," the woman said, "please turn my cat into a handsome young prince?

"With a swish of her wand the cat was transformed and standing before her was a handsome young man with long flowing hair.

She looked up at him, love reflected in her young eyes. 

Smiling, he bent down and said, "I'll bet now you're sorry you had me neutered!" (Author David BurrowsProphecy of Kings)

♦ 7 ♦

Genie Joke: A guy was walking on a beach when he found an old lamp. He rubbed it to get a better look at what he'd found. Pow, out pops a genie.

In typical fashion, if you've ever met a genie, the genie said "I will grant you three wishes, but your ex-wife will get double."

The man was shocked that the genie knew he had an ex-wife, but then again he was a genie.
After thinking for a while he said "I wish I had a mansion." The genie granted it, and of course his ex-wife got two mansions.

The man said "I would like a million pounds." The genie again granted it and his ex-wife got two million pounds.

Then the man said, "Scare me half to death." 
(Author David BurrowsProphecy of Kings)

♦ 8 ♦ 

Fairy joke: A married couple in their early 60s were out celebrating their 30th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic restaurant.

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said,"For being such a wonderful married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each one wish."

"Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband" said the wife.

The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for : the Queen Mary luxury liner appeared in her hands. 

Then it was the husband's turn. He thought for a moment and said:

"Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me. 

"The wife, and the fairy were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish. So the fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! -the husband became 92 years old. (Author David BurrowsProphecy of Kings)

So how about you? What is your favorite SFF joke?

Don't like this question? Look here "Fun Fridays" and see if there is one you do like! Comments are always welcome, even on older posts.

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Thursday, April 17, 2014

Weekly Quote #2 ~ Charles Schulz

"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt."
-- Charles M. Schulz --

Poster Art Quote ~ Charles M. Schultz

About: This is what happens when Mulluane gets bored while feeling creative! This is going to be a weekly feature here in the old belfry. Until I run out of inspiration anyway. {grins} The quote of course is Charles Shultz's but the design is all mine. Sorry about the slow load but it is an high resolution image

This one turned out better than the first (I had the upper right corner slightly off on that one.) What do you think?

Usage: Non-Commercial Fair Use is permitted. The following restrictions apply: Please do not remove or mask the watermark url. Do not sell, print or claim this work as your own and when sharing, pinning, reblogging or posting, a direct link to this post is appreciated. Thanks!

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